Today I'm presenting you some foxes and my *so not ready for summer legs* in semi-transparent black tights. What a combo huh?
First things first: the foxes. This cardigan is one of those unintentional Ebay bargains - you forget that you bid on it and *Bam!* it's yours for only 5 bucks. I've always loved anything fox-printed so I was very happy about the won auction. The colours are pretty autumny actually, but here in Germany the temperatures drop to autumn level in summer a lot so the colour combo is just fine for the recent weather. The knit is really soft and cozy too, so nice! Paired with my summery shorts and sneakers it was the perfect outfit for a chilly summer day.
Okay, now for the aformentioned not ready for summer legs. Actually it's the same every year: Not only do I dread summer because of the heat and high air humidity, no, I dread it even more because in said weather there is no chance I can hide my legs.
I've always hated them for the red birthmarks that crawl up my right leg from the toes to the butt. Granted. I'm over it, I have learned to deal with people staring at it. But what actually really bothers me is the fact that my legs are asymmetric. No joke, take a closer look at the second pic in this post, look at the calves and you will see what I'm talking about. The red birthmarks on my leg somehow shrink the tissue and that's the reason my left leg is bigger than the right one. In most pics you won't see the difference because I've become pretty good at concealing it of course. But believe me, it's such a pain in the butt for me to find fitting jeans...
Anyways, most days I feel confident enough to still wear shorts or skirts and show my legs because A) I know people don't notice unless I tell them about the asymmetry and B) I am trying really hard to love myself with all my flaws inside and outside and get rid of this constant urge to critizise my body. I'm sure all of you know what I mean when in my last post I said that the road to self-confidence and to loving your own body is a struggle, it's really hard, especially with media trying to manipulate the image you have of yourself.
So it's enough now!
Today I feel good enough to post these pictures and say
*Yes I have asymmetrical legs and yes there's a bit of cellulite in the pics too, so what?!*.
I critizise myself way too often, tell myself I'm a freak, a mutant, too fat and whatnot. But it's enough now.
There's still a long road ahead but I can see progress already and posts like this one here are indicators for a slow but steady improvement that's taking place in my head.
What do you think my dear readers? How do you feel about yourselves?
It really is not easy nowadays but we should all try to not pull ourselves or each other down.